Pilgrim's phase report

Pilgrim is Phase 0, ... still.  Kind of disappointing to not see any "real" progress in the 3 weeks that he's been gone.  It's Christmas time.  Complete physicals take some time.   These are the hardest weeks, when you feel like the dogs are not doing anything, yet they are not able to be home.  Reality, of course, is that they are having fun getting massages, walks, group play time, a kennelmate, in addition to some very necessary medical exams.

We miss you, Pilgrim.  You'll do well soon enough!!!

Christmastime Grace

This is not a dog-related post today.

My joy was stolen for a few days this week.  Let me explain.  My hubby's business did well this year and we were excited to be able to be a bit more extravagant with our gifts to our kids this year.  After much thought and shopping (which I normally hate!), I was soooo excited imagining how thrilled and SURPRISED they would be when they opened their gifts on Christmas morn.  But then... I was gone for half a day and left the homeschooled preteen home, in addition to a sick teen.  I should have known.  I should have taken more precaution.  But, I was late for a meeting that morning.  And it happened.  They peeked.  My teen boy's BIG Christmas gift was discovered.  No longer would it be an unexpected surprise.  No, now it was a known.  My emotions ranged from anger to deep sadness and disappointment.  I even told them I was taking back all their gifts (which I knew I wouldn't do, but I hoped at least that would leave them wondering, and hoping for what Christmas morning would bring).  Truth is, they had stolen my joy as the giver of a gift.  I had planned it out with perfection, and they didn't let my plan come to fruition in it's timely manner.   As I reflected on this, and dealt with my emotions, and knew in my heart that they deserved grace, the undeserved gift, it hit me with a thud in my heart.  A moment in which I gulped with understanding.

How many times do we take control of the perfect gift that God has planned for us, to be given in His perfect timing?  In faith, we pray and ask God to help us in a situation (or maybe to achieve possession of something), but when the answer does not seem to be forthcoming or the answer is not the desired one, we peek!  No patient waiting for that moment of revelation to arrive.  I can only wonder how many gifts have been lost or ruined by a lack of trust that my Father has my best interest at heart, and that it is to His pleasure to watch me receive those gifts.  And yet, in spite of the gaps in faith that this sort of thing shows, he gives me grace.  Even when we fail to deserve it, he loves us and shares the best gift of all- an eternal life with Him.

Thank you, God, for your love and patience with me.  Thank you for your Spirit that guides and teaches.  I got my joy back.

Pilgrim's First Phase Report!

Ok, it's not really a phase, but I am so thankful to see him on the report this week.  Phase 0 includes: Walks on campus and playtime in an enclosed grass paddock, doubling kennelmates that play well together, daily grooming, medication administration, as needed, human and dog interactive play or cuddle sessions, introduction to community run playtime, kennel enrichment activities.  Sounds rough, doesn't it?

It has been weird not having a guide dog pup right now.  It is insanely quiet; well, as quiet as life gets with 2 teenagers, a preteen boy and a toddler at Christmastime.  The pet dogs seem to enjoy the extra attention they are getting, and it has been nice to be able to use food rewards on our group walks to reward any good behavior I see fit, and not just recalls...  Rudy, in particular, likes to be back to being my buddy.  He has not climbed in my lap so frequently since we were actively doing agility.  Guess he really does like to be "my" dog, or maybe it's that I am more "his" person.  I can't wait to see what happens in the agility ring next month!

Pilgrim

The last week with Pilgrim flew by!  I did not get to do any fun outings with him, but we did enjoy a few long and blustery walks.  On Saturday afternoon, my puppy raising group met for some photos with Santa.  I forgot to get one of the group, but here is the one of Pilgrim.

Pilgrim was the first of the group to go.  Santa was so pleased to have him come visit, and after greeting him, I asked if he'd like Pilgrim to sit on his stool by his feet, or next to him.  He said that he wanted to hold him!  After an extremely awkward upside-down hold, we turned Pilgrim over for the picture.  Pilgrim was right at home there!  Santa even asked for a copy to be made for him.  It was a fun outing with a great photo memory.

Right after the outing, we met the raiser that was driving Pilgrim, Placer, and George back to campus for formal training.  I cried before he left, and after I got home, but managed to keep things upbeat as I loaded him into the van on top of plush dog beds.  Pilgrim seemed satisfied by the accomodations, and was so pre-occupied by the bed smells that he did not even give me a good bye kiss. 

Due to some issues with the puppies at Guide Dogs for the Blind, we are not able to get a puppy until January...  it is very disappointing, but probably better in the long run as our big Lab sittee is coming for 3 week over Christmas/ New Years.

Good luck in your next venture, Pilgrim.  You are missed, but we are so excited for your future.

The Good and the Sad of Puppy Raising

I finally got an update regarding Pilgrim's recall last night.  While the update actually made me feel better about his return to campus, it also brought the harsh reality that this sweet, maturing boy is really leaving our lives.  It is so hard to say good-bye to the potty-trained, obedient, take anywhere, great house-mannered, knows the routines dog that is sheer joy, and start over with a little bundle of fur that pees and poops to no end, cries in the crate, abuses the toddler, and annoys the older dogs.  But that little bundle of fur is also what makes it possible to send away your previous trainee.  Thank heaven for that puppy breath which I love!

The original plan was for Pilgrim, Placer, and George to return via air cargo.  Now, thanks to some dedicated raisers who have flexible schedules, the 3 dogs will be driven to the Guide Dogs campus on Sunday.  I have had my recalled dogs taken by puppy truck, air cargo, flown with them, and sent them with another raiser.  Air cargo just stinks!!!!!  It feels like you are abandoning your dog with complete strangers.  The airline regulations require the dog to be there, in crate, two hours prior to their flight.  I hope I never have to send another dog back that way again!  Pilgrim loves being in the car, and loves other GDB dogs so I know he will thoroughly enjoy going back by car.

Of course, the recall process is not complete without the arrival of a new puppy to raise.  Our little Black Lab girly will arrive a week from today.  Her name begins with 'N', but I have no idea her age or parents.  Haven't really even thought of possible names- though Nancy was the first that came to mind, and I REALLY hope she is not named.  What do you think it will be?

Pilgrim's Number is Up

I got the call yesterday that I did not want to come for another month.  "Pilgrim's number has been called for the next recall (to formal guide dog training)," she said.  It was the news that I knew was forthcoming, but very much hoped would not come to fruition until January.  I had imagined getting two Christmases with my sweet, golden boy.  I had hoped to not have to potty train a puppy in the two months most wet, and most frigid in Utah.

Just a month ago, I was dead-set against getting a baby puppy should Pilgrim have gone back during November.  L'il M was just too clingy, and it was impossible to step outside without her.  But now, she seems so much older, and has become very adventurous (thus requiring constant supervision).  My family has pleaded for a puppy rather than a transfer.  My brief consideration for a break in my guide dog raising was shelved after finding out that there are 300 fewer puppy raisers currently, than there were just a few years ago.  I find it saddening to tell someone that I cannot put out just a little extra time to help them become freer in life.  Guide dog puppy raising is a gift to those who have a harder time in life.  It is truly not a big enough imposition or trouble to forsake those who can greatly benefit from the companionship and service that guide dogs provide.  So, it looks like a black labby puppy is in our future.

Today, we celebrated the big boy with some Senior Pictures <smile>.  I have stolen that term from Mickelle, who is raising Placer, Pilgrim's brother.  Placer's senior pictures can be seen here- Placer.  He looks much like Pilgrim, only darker and a bit less "fluffy".  My tradition for the past 4-5 puppies that I have raised has been to go on a hike that overlooks the mountain valley that I live in and take photos.

 

 

I wish I had better planned for the lighting.  The gorgeous snow-capped mountains were shadowed by the afternoon, and my attempts to capture them left Pilgrim with these funny sun-spots.  I got a few of the whole hiking crew for today, too.



Dillon, Rudy, Levi, and Pilgrim

 

My hiking group- love them all!





 

It is always the most bittersweet moment in a puppy-raisers life.  Celebrating the wonderful young adult dog that so much time and energy has shaped (in Pilgrim's case, a ridiculous amount of paper towels and cleaning supplies in that first 6 months, as well).  I look forward to Pilgrim's future with hopefulness for him to make it as a guide dog, but certainty that he will make someone's life better with his charm, loyalty, and sweetness.  Our entire family will miss Pilgrim.  I think L'il M may be a bit lost without him.  He has been like a young sibling to her.  They adore each other and are always hanging out playing (occasionally getting into trouble) together.  A whole 'nother post on that.



Catch them being good

I've always been a glass half full kind of person.  I always feel that there is hope in any situation, and that we always can learn from situations that we are less than thrilled with.  That said, I have been thinking a lot lately about making the full move to purely positive methods in "training up" both my dogs and kids.  I have seen the evidence with clicker training, both from the trials that Guide Dogs for the Blind made in training guide dogs, as well as the resounding praise for the clicker methods by the guide dog handlers.  I have seen the much stronger learning that takes place for myself in Rudy's agility training.  Granted, it was very slow learning, and it was really, really hard to not "help" him, but when he got it, he got it!  If I were to always have used clicker training, I am confident that learning would not always be so slow.

We took a parenting class last year, as we have found ourselves a bit overwhelmed by the kids at times.  It was impossible to parent by one method because my kids are all sooo different.  The class was such a far cry from the typical if they do this/do this type of parenting that I typically hear.  Focus was on the relationship, and using problem situations to learn.  Parenting IS very much like dog training. ;)  I have for years known that relationships were the reason behind dog behavior issues in many cases.  Performance dogs will not give their best without that relationship being in prime condition.  If working the guide dog puppies, and they decide to snag that piece of popcorn off the ground, what do we do?  We go back and work it 'til they no longer try to get it (I understand that this exercise began with the negative reinforcement of a collar correction, but at this time in puppy raising, that's all we get).  In a positive training example, I would be prepared to catch my dog not reacting to the dog next door trying to fence fight or waiting outside the kitchen while I prepare dinner, mark it, and treat, thereby increasing that behavior.

My issue lies in the fact that I am not always patient for results, and I have learned other ways that solve behavior problems faster.  In part, it is because the old ways come naturally, whereas I still struggle to think of appropriate dialogue for the 1-yr-old who is on the counter for the 3rd time, getting cookies while I attempt to vacuum for 15 minutes.  I can tell you that there must have been a half dozen times that I responded with irritation to my toddlers incessent disaster-making skills this AM, while trying to homeschool my younger son.  Each time, I told myself, "that wasn't positive", but it achieved the desired response (albeit it was short-lived).  And while my dog is attempting to pull me down the street, I would rather give a good pop to his buckle collar, and be done with it, than to practice catching him being good for 30 minutes while trying to push a stroller and running (OK, maybe I multi-task too much).  But the next time we head out, he pulls until reminded not to pull.  I get tired of repeating myself.  I can tell my child to clear his plate every single day for a month, but he will not clear it on his own.  If I catch him just once doing it, and reward him in some way, I bet he'd "remember" a lot more often. Catch them being good.  Easier said than done when you have 4 kids, 4 dogs, 3 cats all going in/out for hours needing food, arguing, asking for things, telling me about their day, all while I try to get dinner cooked before they have all snacked beyond full and won't eat dinner.  Chaos seems to breed inappropriate behavior in me.  As I have already been reitterating in my mind many times since reading the first two chapters of Unglued, "just because the situation is out of control does not mean that you have to act out-of-control".  Don't get me wrong, I don't frequently get out-of-control, but there are times that the chaos longevity when combined with a fragile state of fatigue turns me into a yeller.  I hate it, always regret it. 

These recurrent situations just prove the point.  When I respond in ways that don't teach the mind, but just avoidance behavior, in most situations the situation will arise again.  So, have I really taught anything?  I guess my take-home is that focusing on positive methods is the humane way to interact with those learning the ropes.  Practice makes perfect, and just as I learned so many other training methods, this one too shall be mastered.

Back to Agility

I fell short of my 4-5 days of running this week.  While I had the logistics figured out, the reality became that I was too tired to drag myself out a couple of times, especially these last two days when the weather became dreary.  The return to standard time has L'il M's sleep schedule all messed up.  She is up at 5AM!  If I could get to bed at 9, that might be OK.  Having teenagers with a baby is way more fatiguing than having several little ones.  I so wish I was someone who could function on 6 hours of sleep instead of 9 being the optimal amount.

As I have continued my doggie goal setting, I am excited to let Rudy finish his agility career, and then perhaps we will do some Rally obedience- clicker style. :)  There are 2-3 local AKC agility trials in January and February.  My plan is to enter as much as I can those weekends, and see what the Ruditude can do.  Winter is his best time for trialing as he LOVES the cold!  I have to focus on his conditioning these next few months, which should nicely coincide with my need to get in shape.  Of course, we need to get to somewhere to practice on a course, as well.  There are a couple options for that, so I will have to see what I can work out.  The challenges for Rudy in Excellent will be that his dog walk is not as fast as it could be (he trots), and he will not get to redo his weave entrance over and again 'til he "gets it".   7 1/2 is getting to be an older competitive agility dog, especially for a German Shepherd. 

Once Rudy completes his agility career, I look forward to doing Rally with Rudy using only clicker methods for training.  I expect that there will be so much more precision in performance than I would get from "traditional" methods.

Just do it!

No, this is not a plug for Nike.  Although I really like Nike, and the concept of "just doing it", but I digress. 
This is not an amazing revelation, but sometimes we just need the cold, hard truth spoken clearly.  To run, you have to put your shoes on and get out there and do it.  To have a clean house, no magic "system" will clean it for you.  You still have to do the work.  To teach your dog to do, or not do something, you have to put the time into that training.  Seems we all look for the magic pill to do our dirty work.  Here's to getting dirty!

Getting real...

I have yet to make this writing thing a regular therapy for myself, although what I do write leads to me thinking about the answers to some of the things I am going through.  I am not sure why I am lead to share publicly that which probably belongs in a journal, but maybe someone has a kindred story...  I guess i just feel led to do it this way.  Life has seasons, some that are incredible, some that just kind of stink.  With faith and perspective, one can always count on things to return to that happy median.

I have set some short-term goals to jump-start the care and keeping of myself.  These include:

• Running 4-5 days a week, with a goal of a half-marathon by June 2013.  The more I thought about what my personal goals should be, the more I realized how necessary this one was.  It makes a HUGE difference in my life.  I feel better, look better ;), drink more water, less coffee, have more patience, and sleep better.  I have figured out how to fit it into my day between the toddler and homeschooling the 5th grader.  Yahooo!!
• Get back to regular church attendance (need I really explain this one?)
• Read more books (currently have Highly Sensitive Child, Unglued, Not Just a Fan on my list, but I need a good dog read.  Let me know if you have a suggested doggie read!
• Blog! Maybe even let someone know I am doing it.. :)
• Finish Rudy's agility career.  As a GSD, age 7, his time for running and jumping are becoming short.  Speed has always been our weak point, but we'll never know if he can become an Excellent agility titled dog until we give it a try.

That's where it's at for now.  It may change with the New Year, to a degree.  Have you begun to think of your goals for 2013?

A long break from the repetitive days seems to have lifted the fog that I have been in for the past while.  A nice week-long visit from parents gave a break and distraction from the everyday routine.  We were able to get away to Aspen, Co for a hockey tounament.  In spite of Toddler M getting the flu hundreds of miles from home and 150 from Aspen (how does one handle puke all over a car seat?) and then being too sick to attend any games, and some disappointing coaching from the novice coach, it was great to get away from the dailies.  And as with anytime that I am away from home, I missed being home!  What sense is that?

Setting some goals for myself in terms of things I want to do and achieve are going to be essential for me to keep my sanity.  I will share those in the days to come.  In the meantime, enjoy my new favorite picture of my little Ladybug and her pal, Pilgrim.

In a Funk or has Life Changed?

As I look at my "about Me" part of the blog, I find that the person described, in fact, no longer describes me.  How does that happen?  It is really an a-ha moment as to *why* I have been feeling such a lack of passion for my daily life, lately.  This blog was started when I had a lot of activities that I was passionate about, and able to pursue.  God gave me a passion for animals, an ability to work with them intuitively, and in turn, they make me feel at peace.  When I don't, I start to feel kind of irritable... (sorry, family!).  Same with the running, it makes me relaxed and gives me the time and space to think & pray.  The lack of running has left me exhausted & stressed.

So, why don't I keep up with my passions?  Priorities, I guess.  That's really what it always comes down to, right?  A family with children at the ages of mine leads to a very busy atmosphere, and trying to coordinate everyone's activities is a full time job.  No day has the same schedule, so finding a routine for exercise, and doing things with the dogs is hard!  Add to this the quickly diminishing amount of daylight and increasing cold, it seems to be harder to get these two things back into my day.

I have been wanting to regularly blog for awhile now.  Used to be "the thing" to do in the Guide Dogs world, but Facebook has taken over this much more thoughtful form of writing (OK, Facebook cannot even be considered writing) and sharing.  I did not want to write the dry diary of what I did with my dogs, per se.  I didn't really want to write only about the activities of my family.  My attitude has not been the sort of thing that one wants to share on a regular basis.  Maybe this realization of what I have lost, and my desire and NEED to get it back is the reason this blog was ever started...  God works in mysterious ways.  That I have no doubt, and have been witness to time and time again.

So, this blog has been reborn.  It is the pathway to balancing the family life while remembering and celebrating the woman that God made me to be.  It really does have a lot to do with the dogs, after all.

Wordless Wednesday

This may or not be a "normal" day at our house!

Birthday (and Recall ) Season has Begun!

Today marks the beginning of 5 months of busy holidays and birthday planning for our family.  I-man celebrated his special day today with a bowling bash complete with matching shirts for the guests.  They seemed to have a great time, though I think the bowling alley was happy to see us go.   The event was also L'il M's first time "bowling".   She was adorable, loved it and actually managed to knock down 9 pins with the most incredibly slow-moving ball that she rolled from the line.

I was plagued, not once, but twice today with not having a camera for significant moments in my kids lives.  Ugh- sometimes I wish I had a small snap n go type camera.  Maybe I would keep it more handy and accessible.  So no pictures to post about the day.

September and October make me feel so exhausted much of the time.  Back-to-school, many parent meetings, fall sports, play practices, trying to keep tabs on the kids grades, not to mention the usual home needs.  Then there is that daily requirement to feed your family dinner.  I think that one event is my nemesis.  We cannot manage to eat as a family but on rarity, and it really cheapens the value of time spent planning and cooking a meal.  I have work to do on my attitude in that area.  Eeeks!

Guide Dog puppy recall talk is surfacing.  There are only 2 trucks left that will empty my club of it's mostly mature puppies.  Raisers feeling saddened by the imminent departure of the amazing dogs those sassy little babies became.  Raising little puppies in the middle of a Rocky Mountain winter is not always fun, and many committed raisers are discouraged by the prospect (ahem, no one in particular) of having to go outside every hour in freezing weather.  In reality, I don't mind it that much, but L'il M is in such a phase right now, that I cannot get out of her sight in the house, let alone if I go outside without her, she freaks.  I think the secondary effects of a puppy could do me in.  What to do?  Ask for a transfer!  Unless, of course, there is a female black lab Simon puppy....  that I don't know if I could resist!   Only time will tell.

Been a while...

Ok, I admit it.  I kinda stink at the blogging thing.  I feel drawn back into it, although I think the posts will begin to take a different focus.  Much has happened, so I will update on the previous posts first.

• Janetta graduated from Guide Dogs for the Blind in January 2012.  She was the last puppy from retired breeder, Elsa, to graduate.  Janetta was placed with the most amazing woman who's lifestyle so closely mimics mine, it is kind of freaky.  Guide Dogs placement staff is truly amazing!  We are so happy with the life our special girl has!  There was a special article in the Gresham, Ore paper about the pair.  You can read it here www.theoutlookonline.com/news/story.php?story_id=132806364140184500.
• Keiko also graduated from Guide Dogs for the Blind in March 2012. 
• Rudy completed his Open agility titles in February 2012.  I am so nervous about competing at the "excellent" level.  That's where all the "big dogs" hang out!
• Baby M is now Toddler M, as the posts to come will show.